#i've been gone from the rpc for like what a year or two

[imaginarianisms]

here's a few things the rpc has REALLY gotta get back into doing !!

Reading Each Other's Rules !!

Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate & Not jumping to conclusions about people & assuming other people's character & intentions & Ask what they mean & if you need clarification on something Ask Them. i promise you things would likely go a lot more smoothly & bad experiences with people not communicating with me/you/us that could've been avoided or at the very least reduced if we simply spoke to one another & less feelings would be hurt.

Stop Vaguing People & Getting Involved In Shit & Being Mean To People For Petty Shit When Things Can Literally Be Communicated In Private Respectfully. civil discussions can go a really long way. if the disrespect or offense in question isn’t malicious, there’s no need to approach the topic maliciously. you’d be surprised at just how much can be solved by just asking someone to clarify something.

Understand That Just Because Someone Writes Something Or A Character Does Not Mean That They Condone Or Endorse Them Y'all Why Are We Still Having This Conversation In The Year 2024

don't like something or you genuinely can't handle a topic? use the tools at your disposal to curate your own space (there's two magical things on your screen: the scrollbar & the block button that you can use that can be your true besties frfr) that's Your responsibility tungle dot hellsite dot com user, not anyone else's.

respecting others & understanding that's another human person sitting on the other side of that screen that has hopes & dreams & feelings the same way you do.

telling your friends how lovely & talented they are & how they portray their muses !! there's a whole lot of negativity going on, the best thing we can do is lift each other up & treat each other with kindness & compassion !!

commenting on peoples' posts, hcs, art, edits, etc., telling them you see it & that it looks good, it's cool, it's entertaining, etc., bc we as content creators can't read your mind & as nice as it'd be for us to always serve ourselves with our work, realistically people Will lose motivation to continue creating after a while without some kind of support. if you Like Something then SAY SOMETHING!!!!!!

sending each other's muses messages about other muses they're talking to, characters from their canon if applicable, their worldbuilding & generally getting actively involved in the narratives & worlds other people create & encouraging people to discuss them. there's nothing i like more than doing that, it feels great.

asking random unprompted questions about your friends' characters without fear it's "too much" (THAT'S YOUR ANXIETY BRAIN TALKING!!!!! DON'T LISTEN TO IT SOMETIMES OUR BRAINS LIE!!!!!) provided the question isn't invasive or rude, ESPECIALLY if the character is an original and/or fandomless character.

sending heartfelt & honest words of positivity about other people & the work they do, not chainmail, not lazy generic shit, but out of real kindness from the heart.

Drawing People Fanart / Making Graphics / Making Drabbles of their characters / ships / OC's !!!! please !!! really !!! most people adore it !!!! i Promise you that taking the time & putting in the effort to show someone that the work they do inspired the stuff you do will make anyone's fuckin day. it'd make me explode & die tbh.

Telling!!!!! Other!!!!!!!!!!!! People!!!!!!!!!!! That!!!!!!!!!!! We're!!!!!!!!!! All!!! Doing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jobs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Actually Interact With Each Other. i have no idea what's going on these last few years but years ago we used to interact w/ each other a lot more than we used to. send asks & memes & prompts to each other, ask each other questions about the muns & their muses & actually take the time to interact with your moots & muses.

acknowledging our mental health!!!!! you're not a robot, you're a human being!!!!! be okay with the fact that folx need space & time! it's okay to not be in the mood all the time, you're a living breathing human being that matters, respect that.

make sure Other people feel included in discord servers, rp groups, multi-way threads, events & just overall & not just the few people you talk to. it's perfectly normal & understandable that you may vibe with some people more than others, but only talking to other people you're familiar with can lead to your other moots feeling left out. your moots aren't numbers on your follower list, they're people & writers & they deserve reciprocity & vice versa. if you're not going to engage with someone then why follow them. that's literally the whole point of being moots.

surround yourself with people who actually love you.

acknowledge each other's artwork, graphics, metas, threads & worldbuilding in your own portrayals & works. PLEASE. PEOPLE !!!! DON'T!!!!!! KNOW!!!!! YOU!!!!!! LIKE!!!!! THEM!!! IF!!!!! YOU!!!!! SAY!!!!!!!! NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!! TELL!!!!!!!! THEM!!!!!!! THEY!!!!!! MATTER!!!!!

Literally Just Being Fucking Nice To Each Other Openly For No Reason Or Prompt

understand that there's a glaring, obvious hatred of & disregard & a subconscious bias & avoidance of characters of color (ESPECIALLY black & indigenous / native characters of color), elder characters, really young characters, characters with strong cultural and/or religious influences that aren’t easily digestible/palatable/dumbed down/fetishized especially if they're tied to a marginalized community, female characters who don't automatically ship and/or smut with you, disabled characters, mentally ill & neurodivergent characters who aren’t concentrated into Edgy Aesthetics TM & nothing else, t.wo s.pirit, t.rans, n.onbinary, g.enderfluid, a.gender & i.ntersex characters (especially queer characters of color), fat characters, nonhuman characters, especially characters who's marginalized identities intersect with each other, characters who aren’t cis and/or heterosexual and/or p.erisex skinny white people in their 20's ... i could truly Go On but actually practicing what y'all preach & opening up your minds to new things & portrayals, ask yourselves Why you don't interact with or write any of these characters if that applies (which likely does) & start showing up for these muses & the muns that portray them, ESPECIALLY muns of color, because these are stories that NEED to be heard, loved, respected & most of all appreciated.

[idolbound]

LET'S GET REACQUAINTED ! hey rpc ! lets be honest, datv brought us all back in one way or another either you're a veteran or new, i'm sure there is stuff that has changed or we don't know each other so let's have a game about it to reintroduce each other ! repost this to do the same & tag some pals if you want !

Name / Penname: Lexie for veterans, did you go by something previously ? if so what was it if you're comfortable sharing that name &/or penname: Nope, I've always gone by Lexie. age & gender( if comfortable sharing ): 30, female what was your first dragon age muse: I want to say it was my Cassandra, originally @stabbystabseeker , then I had my Hawke and Inquis both for a hot second as well as Meredith in 2015. do you have any other darp muses / blogs: I have Cassandra, my Rook, and soon to be Rana Savas on my multi @afraidofchange what muses / blogs do you have outside of darp: Mostly still just my multi, but I did throw my D&D/Bg3 Paladin Rama on a solo blog for the time being @wolfbluff thedas has two moons: true | false - is that not the canon?

single line, para, or novella: all of the above, but I don't like single line stuff to go on for more than a few replies/single evening. I need at least some exposition and description lol. plotting or winging it: Typically memes or plotting more generally. It doesn't have to be super specific but I like having mutually shared ideas. fighting threads, you bold enough for them?: I write a villain with a boss fight; of course I'm down to write them. Meredith is also a powerful templar, and isn't afraid to fuck someone up. (this would require plotting, obviously no god modding, but yknow). what content warnings are on your blog?: Drug usage with lyrium (or cocaine in modern verse), violence, PTSD, violence, gore/blood, uh, genocide of the Circle mages, etc. I don't sanitize Meredith, but I approach these topics with respect. what things do you need tagged for your comfort?: suicide & self-harm.

shipping preferences: single | multi | no ship | polyship (sorry Meredith is polyphobic xoxo)- typically, I'm open to separate ships, but because of who Meredith is, some plotting is necessary - I do not change her character to suit a ship (but I have a greater ability to ship her in post-DA2 verses or modern verse, where she isn't as limited). shipping boundaries: Meredith is a lesbian. I ship her with other female muses. She's also between 35-45 years of age during the Kirkwall timeline, and while I'm open to certain age gaps, I prefer to at least ship her with someone 25+ and has their frontal lobe fully developed. I'm pretty selective with my ships, but if there's a vibe, I'd be interested in exploring it (casual, short or long term). favorite ships in dragon age: There are so so many canon x canons, but if we're gonna count romance options in the games: Morrigan/Warden, Isabela/f!Hawke, Cassandra/Inquis, Neve/Rook. favorite ships from the rpc( tag your friends ships ! ): There are a few whose URLs are escaping me but trust me when I say that I see you, especially those of us that have been writing the same ships w the same people for years. So shout out to @sanctamater for writing Kirkwall's Worst Sapphics together <3

fun facts about yourself that may have changed since in the past ten years( when inquisition dropped )--

I moved halfway across the country and I'm 2.5 years into writing my doctorate. (Also it's been almost 10 years since I started writing Mere). My best friend is due with twins any day now (we only know Baby A is female, we still don't know what Baby B's sex is because they've kept their legs closed this entire time), but I'll be an auntie before 2024 is out.

be honest, did you miss darp. come on now--

I missed a lot of the people I wrote with back in the day and thankfully many of them have come back. I don't miss the crazy insane drama / insane behaviour that happened in this RPC, and quite frankly, I do wish more people would branch out and write more actually sapphic women, dwarves, and villains / morally grey protagonists (beyond blood mage Hawkes for example).

challenge round ! put a small top five things unrelated to dragon age !

Let's do Music things since spotify wrapped just dropped:

Chappell Roan's rise to stardom in 2024 (but I was a fan about a year before because @magicbound recommended me Red Wine Supernova on Discord).

Brat Summer.

Katie Gavin's solo album What a Relief emotionally destroyed me because it released a week after my break up, but I still bought it on vinyl.

Cat Burns did not only a cover of I like the way you kiss me but she also did teenage dirtbag and they're both amazing!

Megan Thee Stallion is the greatest rapper of our generation. I said what I said.

tagging: @sanctamater @theharellan @theodosiani @prophetries

[littlehoundthings]

LET'S GET REACQUAINTED ! hey rpc ! lets be honest, datv brought us all back in one way or another either you're a veteran or new, i'm sure there is stuff that has changed or we don't know each other so let's have a game about it to reintroduce each other ! repost this to do the same & tag some pals if you want !

Tagged by: @redemptior

Name / Penname: Jay (name AND pen name) for veterans, did you go by something previously ?name &/or penname: I think for as long as I've been in DARP, I've always been Jay? I've gone by Drake in the past as well. My blog started out as AsherielAmell, then became AnimaXSalutator. age & gender( if comfortable sharing ): 33, Nonbiney what was your first dragon age muse: Ashe, funnily enough. Back in like... early 2010s I think? do you have any other darp muses / blogs: Nope! I'm allergic to writing canon characters. thedas has two moons: Why stop at two?

single line, para, or novella: I prefer doing para tbh. I'm not quite sure on the definition, but I think I do some novella stuff here and there depending on the scene. plotting or winging it: Winging it is fun! I enjoy plotting for setting up the scene and then letting things go from there. fighting threads, you bold enough for them? Hand me the violence. what content warnings are on your blog?: You can see them all on my Carrd, but generally basic stuff related to Dragon Age (horror, blood, gore, etc). I'll generally tag if anything is blatant. what things do you need tagged for your comfort?: I haven't run across anything I need tagged really.

shipping preferences: single | multi | no ship | polyship . I'm a poly hoe IRL, and that translates to my writing. I'm comfortable keeping each ship to their own verse if that's the writer's comfort level, but also <motions to existence> shipping boundaries: As long as there's chemistry and prior interaction I'm generally happy with it. The one thing I will not do/accept is shipping right off the bat, especially if I don't know you as a writer. favorite ships in dragon age: Amell/Morrigan, Cousland/Lelianna, Hawke/Isabela, Howe/Sword to the face, Dorian/The Iron Bull, Inquisitor / Iron Bull, Inquisitor / Dorian, Rook / Emmrich, Rook / Davrin, Taash / Harding, Chantry / Exploding.

fun facts about yourself that may have changed since in the past ten years( when inquisition dropped )--

Hospitalized for mental health, diagnosed with autism, back to college for IT certificates, engaged to my two wonderful partners, went NC with bio-family, moved into an apartment with sibling + partners.

be honest, did you miss darp. come on now--

Why do you think I came back. 8)

challenge round! put a small top five things unrelated to dragon age !

Top five favorite games in no order

Rimworld

Metaphor: Refantazio

Stardew Valley

Sims 4

Warframe

tagging: @avrorean, @theshirallen, Only if you two haven't done it yet.

[mocksfate]

LET'S GET REACQUAINTED ! hey rpc ! lets be honest, datv brought us all back in one way or another either you're a veteran or new, i'm sure there is stuff that has changed or we don't know each other so let's have a game about it to reintroduce each other ! repost this to do the same & tag some pals if you want !

Name / Penname: nora! from eleonora. ppl irl call me ele, but online i've always gone with nora. for veterans, did you go by something previously ? name &/or penname: nope, i'm nora wherever i go. forever. age & gender ( if comfortable sharing ): 27 yrs old, a girliepop 😔 what was your first dragon age muse: idt i had a first muse. i'm p sure i started with a multimuse because of my inability of writing just one (1) character at the time. my fondest memories go to zev.ran, of course. he is and always be my favorite character of the franchise. do you have any other darp muses / blogs: i used to have a single muse blog for my surana (which ended up being a ton of fun while it lasted) but again, i just have too much muse for other little guys and they're constantly rattling the bars of their cages. what muses / blogs do you have outside of darp: i had other multimuses (a hsr one & a general gaming-animanga one but they're inactive rn) and obv my main @malewifezevran ✨ thedas has two moons: and they're lovers 🩷

single line, para, or novella: max i can do is 2k words on a good day chief....... language barrier + my bare ass script writing style don't help. i prefer one-two paras replies. plotting or winging it: i'm a plotting kinda girl. i like to put muses into Situations, but i prefer to figure out a possible dynamic or how the thread might develop with my writing partner ^_^ fighting threads, you bold enough for them? i have written very few in these ten years, but idt i'd mind? my vocabulary might not be as large to get a satisfying one. what content warnings are on your blog?: i honestly try to avoid triggering topics on my blogs, and if there are some, they're in the backstory of my characters which i won't openly write about unless my partner is cool with that. everything gets tagged, obviously. what things do you need tagged for your comfort?: mostly irl nsf.w pictures? those give me a bit of a ick. noncon (i follow nobody who writes it so thankfully i never have to read anything abt it), syringes and childbirth also are big nonos.

shipping preferences: single | multi | no ship | polyship. aw god, i'm THE multishipper. i cherish all kind of dynamics and i think so many characters just have the potential(tm). poly i'd be down only with close friends, cuz i know we can always write to each other/there's plenty of communication. shipping boundaries: never jump on/force a ship with me - we will lose mutualship as it makes me uncomfortable (exception to this rule are close friends with whom the ship has been developed beforehand in dms): i am here for the slow burn. i also don't like +13-15yrs age gaps (but nora, you write emmri- I PLAYED WITH A 46 YRS OLD ROOK, NEXT) and inc3st (duh).

fun facts about yourself that may have changed since in the past ten years: i'm way chiller and i can easily shrug things off than i used to omd. i sadly was one of those 'weh nobody wants to write with me ):' roleplayers and dear lord. thank you for the character development me @ me

be honest, did you miss darp. come on now-- did i.......... uh, i didn't miss it as a whole, but i did miss specific people because it was so fun to thread with them. i'm glad some are back 🥺

challenge round! put a small top five facts unrelated to dragon age ! - - i've been dungeon mastering for 5 years and i'm super proud 🩷 - i'm enjoying dos2 a bit too much and that scares me, chat - i own a big, fat cat named puka - my favorite dessert is the one and only tiramisù despite not being fond of coffee (yes, i got my italian citizenship card revoked for that) - i've never gone ice skating and it breaks my heart........

tagging: @venombloom ; @fatewoven ; @mcurnwatch & @celestrahl 🫵 (if you want to, of course)

[dragcnlxrd]

So in like 6 hours here it will be the blessed end of 2023. And while I doubt my new year will be anything thrilling I have learned a lot during this year. I've learned that it's super easy to detach myself from giving a shit about the person that incubated me, I've learned that when push comes to shove I'm the only person in my house that will step up and take care of my elderly father, provide food on the table at the cost of my own needs, and tolerate the abuse hurled at me both physical and verbally daily by the woman that incubated me.

I've learned that you can be negative in your bank account for a bit before your bills get rejected. I've learned that while you're recovering from a broken ankle and a stroke your job and coworkers don't give a shit that you've been gone for more than 6 months because you truly don't matter to the world. I've also learned that state temporary disability will NOT pay you enough to live off of at all thus constantly in the negative funds, nor is it reliant.

But aside from all of that I also learned I can find solace in a video game, that interacting with these fictional cgi characters would fill me with some semblance of joy and what it's like to feel loved. So my first appreciation will be to Baldur's Gate 3 and to my Tav Ashtara because I've learned to be happy through her.

THAT'S not only what I want to say, I want to also say how much I've learned about myself here writing with my tiny handful of partners! You guys that continue to give me the time of day and spare a few moments to reply to my stuff have made me happy but there are a few of you that earn special places.

@ravusnightblossom is first and foremost forever going to be my number one. Fox has quickly become my bestest friend and I'm so very thankful that she flew me across the country to hang out with her for a week. It was the best week of my life and I miss being a potato on her couch. But not only that Fox has been a lifesaver for me for everything and I don't think I could ever imagine my life with out her. Ravus has become a major part of Lysander's life and I honestly think this blog basically revolves around their ship half the time! Love you!

@xx--ofmanythoughts--xx Raevon!!! Okay so I can not express how much I love you! How much I love your blog and your writing! You truly have a gift. I love that we can both scream about an unpopular opinion and agree with it! I love our HC and when we get to world build! I'm so happy we write together and I hope we bust out more in the next year.

@thescaledqueen YOU ARE SO PRECIOUS TO ME! I hope you know that! You were the only person in the GoT RPC that gave me a true chance and I am forever grateful for that! I love your Shireen to bits! And I am sorry I've not been as active with these two lately but I am hoping that this new year gives me more motivation to continue dumping love upon you and your blog!

@mystiic listen I already sent you love and answered love but I LOVE YOU OKAY! I love your muse and I'm so looking forward to the new year and building more world with you and Amari and UGH!!! yeah...

@brideofcdragons YOU! I love you! Okay?! I love your blog and I love your writing and I love your Dany and I'm always so excited when you pop on my dash and we get to write something together and I'm always just so happy to see you back to writing! You have a true gift and I cherish you so much!

@call-2-arms LISTEN! I love you okay! And no one is going to tell me you're not Jamie Fookin Lannista! Haha I also cherish the fact that you're always there to answer my silly questions or translate something from Australia! I mean BIN CHICKENS! Who would even know what that was!! You're also super fuckin talented with your writing and I am always in awe of your replies!

@untilthcyrot CHRISTINA!!! Thought I forgot about you?! I think NOT! You've been with me since my Norse Loki blog... You've continued to follow me and talk to me and write with me for so long! You're a talented and beautiful person and I love whenever we get to chat with each other! I love your blogs and I love you muchos!

This is getting to be super long and word vomity but I honestly do love and appreciate all of my mutuals! You guys just writing with me make my day. I hope the new year brings everyone happiness and joy and that we continue to write together! Please remember even if I didn't mention you here you still mean a lot to me! I cherish you!

[spurnedadulthood]

hello, could you please set your queue to every 6 or 12 hours? to have it go off every hour is clogging my dash. not to be rude your message could be read in an unfavorable light the way you point out that only three muses connected with kensuke while you go and take your partners for granted. it was borderline passive aggressive if not downright guilt trip and it might not be your intention. i’m sure you are a wonderful person with many ideas if given the chance and it might be the wording in that post. i wish you the best of luck

First of all, I apologize for clogging your dash, but at the same time, you could always just unfollow if it bothered you that much? Like, due to the fact differing timezones is a thing, I wanted to ensure more people see my post so they can decide from there whether or not they want to unfollow/block me.

Second of all, I've been gone for a long while, so like I already said, everyone I was writing with either broke mutuals with me during my absence, became inactive, deactivated, or retired from the RPC entirely, so I don't know what you want me to say? Besides, I think you're overestimating how large my writing pool is, because not only is it rare for my threads to ever advance past two notes, it's not as though I had people clamoring to write with me; in fact, getting more interactions on here has often been akin to pulling teeth for the last two years and I'm not joking when I say the last notif I ever got was in February 2, so I have no idea what 'roleplay partners' I managed to take for granted, when really, it's the other way around.

I mean, you can say 'lack of activity doesn't reflect interest' all you want, but besides my own reblogs, my activity page literally shows two other notifs, and I can't even scroll down it... because nothing past it exists, and most of my followers I do have are inactive, because again, I have not been here.

Like, the whole reason I ended up vanishing from Kensuke's blog to begin with was because I was disheartened by how hardly anyone interacted with him and that has sadly been a reoccurring thing that happens again and again. Seriously, not only do the starters I write for people tend not to get replied to, I frequently get flaky muns essentially wasting my time and getting my hopes up for interactions... so when you consider how Kensuke is a character from a very niche series, how unwelcoming the RPC is towards characters from less than mainstream fandoms, and how dead tumblr RP has recently been, it's only natural for him to only have three bonds at best...

I mean, you might not like it, but it's the factual truth? And I'm not the type to really sugarcoat things, so as far as I'm concerned, actions speak louder than words; therefore, I don't really get the sense many are still interested in Kensuke as a muse. In fact, maybe I'm missing something here, but I'm genuinely confused on how it's guilt-tripping/passive-aggressiveness when I say that as a result of a lot of people moving on from tumblr roleplay (whether it's because they deactivated or retired from the RPC) and people I've been writing with understandably blocking me, Kensuke no longer has a lot of muses left that have a bond with him... so if people end up taking that the wrong way, then I don't know what to tell them, other than the fact I have legit been gone for a long time, so not many of my old roleplay partners are still around?

Either way, I do not appreciate the fact you didn't even bother to address this privately with me and forced me to unnecessarily post this on the dash where everyone could potentially see, so until further notice, I'm disabling the anonymous function... because I really would not prefer dragging this out longer than it has to be dragged out. I will, however, do as you request and space out my queue to post every 6 hours, but next time, please message me privately if you have any concerns.

[alwaysthesitter]

I wasn't going to make a post about this, because believe it or not, I'm trying to stay out of the drama (though with everything happening now, I'd hope people would believe it).

Having the person that has abused myself and so many others on this website being finally brought to light has been the most rewarding thing. It feels like finally having a verdict of 'innocent' after a trial that, for me at least, has been going on since 2019. It looks like for others it has gone on even longer. That being said, I read her apology, and it doesn't change things. I am such a firm believer in giving people second chances, and honestly, if said person came into my inbox and apologized to my face I would probably (and naively) accept it and forgive. But right now, I have such mixed feelings about this entire thing.

This doesn't change the fact that I felt the need to go into hiding in the first place, which is what recently got me called out as a terrible person (the irony). I went into hiding BECAUSE of this behavior, and now I hope people see that. But it doesn't change the fact that in July, during the first call out, I was spending time trying to fight a fight that shouldn't have been mine instead of spending what could have been my last moments with my grandmother (I'm relieved af that it wasn't but I went on that trip expecting it to be my last). It doesn't change the fact that I went to a con with friends this past weekend and spent most of my time locked up in my hotel room, drinking and sobbing and contemplating s*icide. I know that may sound dramatic, but anyone that knows me knows that roleplay is my biggest stress outlet. I'm a therapist in real life (surprise, if you all didn't know that). I spend so much time dealing with other people's emotions that I need to step into a fictional world to give myself space. That space was shattered for me.

It doesn't change the fact that I have spent not only the past two weeks, but MONTHS before, seriously contemplating what I did wrong. Gaslighting at its finest - my friend kept telling me there was no proof of any of my claims, that I did nothing, but I kept saying, "holy shit, what if I did, and I don't even remember?" My brain was trained to think I was in the wrong for something I never even did. I went to therapy for that shit. The first call out against me was RIGHT AFTER MY DAD DIED in 2019 and I was a disaster and went to seek help. I had friends scroll through my blogs for days, only to come up with nothing because nothing was there, but I thought there had to be something.

And it doesn't change the fact that I have lost people. I have cried over people. People I had been nothing but kind and generous to were suddenly believing ONE PERSON'S twisted opinion and commenting that they had been fooled, that I was the devil, that my kindness was all a ploy to hide from the call out. In July, I had over 200 people on this site claim I was dangerous and unsafe and ill and needed to be run off. I was labeled a villain by someone who, not a shocker to me, was hiding the fact that they were a villain themselves by harassing others with the same things they had done.

I normally don't believe call outs, clearly. Because I've been on the end of one that was incredibly false. But considering that my past 4 years have been nothing but terrifying for me, nothing but pure anxiety, nothing but nights of depression? This is a relief. But it also doesn't change the fact that there are victims here, with scars that might not ever heal. Those friends won't ever come back to me. If they do, it's going to be hard to have trust considering they flipped on a dime with their attitude towards me based on one person's bullshit Google Doc.

I don't expect anything to change for myself moving forward from this. But I hope the RPC learns as a whole. Not to believe things just because one person claims them. That 'proof' is often misconstrued and fabricated to match the offender. That call out culture is absolutely disgusting and nothing but a witch hunt in order to run innocent people out of the community just because one person has a problem with them. To believe your own truths, to trust your own interactions with people, and to just quite frankly do fucking better. Do better, RPC. Don't spread the hate. If you don't like someone, block them and shut up, rather than telling everyone else that they aren't allowed to write with them because they're "evil." I hope you all learn, truly.

And for everyone that has been a victim, including those of you that are no longer on this website because of this fear and harassment, I hope you finally get your moment of peace. Your breath of freedom. You all deserve that.

[immoralraigan]

♥ What's the WORST thing that has happened to you rp wise?

salty mun saying salty things meme

So like-- I haven't had many terrible experiences with rp, I guess? maybe I'm just lucky. But the ones that did hit me were so catastrophic i may or may not have a bit of trauma connected to it.

The most notable one actually involved an entire ring of friends, who I thought at the time that I'd keep for the rest of my life. Together with them, we made up the entirety of a game's tumblr rp community at the time; it wasn't very big, honestly. ... OK, well I'll just come out and say it coz I don't think there's anyone left from that bygone era: it was the f f 9 rpc. We were tight. The whole group was welcoming to newcomers, and honestly I was super proud to be a part of it.

I won't deny that there was a black sheep or two; a couple people that actively caused drama, but I was never targeted by them, and the majority of us just tried to ignore them anyway.

(Actually yknow what I'm putting the rest of this under a readmore bc it's SUPER long)

Either way, things started to fall apart after a lot of the group got absorbed into playing f f 14... And uh... one by one activity in the group slowed to a stop. I felt like I was being left behind and decided to, yknow, try it out... not coz I was interested in 14, but coz like, I wanted to keep hanging out with my Friends, yknow-- not be forgotten and all.

I kind of hated it? Like, I absolutely despised f f 14? I hated being locked into doing dungeons, I hated the story, I hated the music and the art direction... I REALLY hated the battle system and the UI layout... and I especially hated that I was pouring time and money into this that I wasn't gonna get back. I was happy to still be with my friends, but the strain was showing between everyone even more than I had been noticing before. There was drama I hadn't been aware of going on that I wished I hadn't become privy to. They were becoming less of a friend group and more of a... mass of toxicity. In short, I was not having fun and I was wasting money and time on something that was only causing me stress.

A year & a half and $400+ later, I canceled my subscription. And no matter what any of them did, I would not do any more free trials or accept gift subscriptions-- I was that fed up with it.

I guess more in-fighting continued even after I had left. I stayed in the d iscord server, but I felt more and more forgotten over time, and I guess there was this one last argument between two people that just-- that was the final straw for me. So I left the d iscord without any further notice. I'm pretty sure nobody in that group minds that I'm gone, even to this day. I imagine they didn't like me for being so neutral about everything and unapologetically despising f f 14. I don't fault them for that. They're free to stand by their game.

It's not all bad though, I guess. I at least still have good memories of the many shenanigans we got up to in the rp days, and the old rp blog is still around-- though my own antics from that time makes me cringe now, lol. Either way. I don't blame anyone for any of what happened. I still care a lot about those people and hope they're doing well, no matter what path they chose in life. The only thing I've blamed in this story for the longest time is f f 14, namely for tearing them away from me and bringing out the worst in everyone. That and I guess I blame myself for having such flimsy constitution against these things.

Oh one last about all that drama-- the 'black sheep' people I mentioned about mid-post? They were at the center of the in-game f f 14 drama, from what I could gather. It was just typical... I guess they finally got to the group after all.

But yeah I guess that's less rp-related and more just... "hello time for your precious friend group to be torn apart" related.

[rpbetter]

My name used to be Raven on this blue hellsite and I've been stalked and harassed for months by some random person who hates my guts over one mistake on a blog that doesn't even exist anymore. They say I drove people off the site but I don't know who I did it I did and if I did I'm sorry but I guess that's not good enough. Anyways an ex friend told my stalker about my RP blog urls and now I had to leave my RP blogs because my stalker was sending my mutuals baseless accusations about what I'd supposedly done that's so bad. Meanwhile I've had to get therapy for this stalking and supposed callout that hasn't come despite literal blackmail saying they would post it, and deal with accusations from ex friend about how apparently I'm some toxic piece of shit who made them self harm even though I have never told them to do anything like that and was never anything but supportive, literally messaged him apologizing, and I'm not the one who told an actual literal stalker in their 40s I don't know to come after me. The stalker keeps saying they're furious at me for not liking proshippers but I don't even know what that means and I've never used that terminology. I'm starting to seriously doubt my own memory about everything. Even though I know for a fact I didn't fucking send anyone anon hate and I've never been called Mable at any time in my life that's what they're saying I did and I'm so fucking tired of this shit and I don't know what to do I don't want to stop doing on Tumblr I just want this to be fun again but I can't do that if I'm being stalked so guess I gotta stay gone for good right? I don't know what to do. I'm so fucking tired.

Hey there, Former Raven who isn't That Raven!

For what it's worth, prior to that one, I've interacted with two Ravens just on tumblr. Over the decades of RPing, it's got to be a total of six or more. It's a very popular mun name to use, and that's all fine and well until someone shitty is using the same name. Then, you become another victim of their poor behavior.

And this person? It is a lot of poor behavior.

I think you deserve some context, since you are suffering for it. It wasn't just one mistake on a blog that doesn't exist anymore. This person was causing problems well before they made what definitely was not a mistake earlier this year. Taking it upon yourself to judge another RPer as worthy of having their rules screenshot and spread around the RPC as a demonstration of a slew of accusations because you'll take any opportunity to misconstrue things and start drama, isn't a mistake. Neither is repeatedly breaking the rules of a vent blog, then using it as a list to create callouts on a callout blog you created for this purpose. This was only claimed to be "a mistake" after they managed to, indeed, cause several blog deletions and other blogs to go on hiatus, damaging numerous people's mental health, and starting a truly impressive shit storm in the RPC. When they finally got enough backlash for their behavior, it was suddenly a mistake. Not that the victim-blaming or accusations or assertions of being in the right stopped with the half assed apologies and claims of it being a mistake.

None of this was a mistake, and it isn't a mistake that they're doing it again now. At some point, continually starting meme blogs that operate as a front for harassment on your numerous RP and callout blogs, isn't a mistake. When you make a mistake, and literally everyone does, you're sorry for what your actions have caused and you don't keep doing the same thing.

This is why people are so angry, and why it's coming up again in unfortunate ways like harassing you - they're actively pulling this shit again currently. This is also one of the reasons why I repeatedly asked people not to behave like that Raven and their friends and even their imaginary friends the first time this involved me. Not only am I never going to be alright with harassment, no matter how much someone has asked for it with their behaviors by doing so to others, on a long enough timeline, someone innocent is going to be caught up in it. With someone like the other Raven who has a ton of blogs and seems to appear whenever and wherever there is drama, it isn't even necessary to have ever shared a mun name with them for people to be accused of being them. Harassing people is wrong anyway, but it's never worth the risk of taking it to the wrong person.

I wish there was some way you could prove to people it isn't you, but there isn't. At this point, I doubt anyone sending you these things would be willing to believe you anyway. Once people are determined enough that you are someone else, nothing is going to convince them otherwise. So, I'd stop trying if I were you, and definitely stop apologizing for things you did not do. I absolutely understand empathizing with people and the desire to apologize just in case you did something hurtful unbeknownst to you at the time, as well as the impact this has eventually on one's ability to believe themselves, but it's only going to make these people feel like you're verifying guilt. If you want to apologize, apologize that they had this happen to them, preferably while reminding them that isn't good to turn around and do the same to someone else.

It's very rarely ever my suggestion that anyone needs to leave unless that's right for their mental health or otherwise what they genuinely want to do. So, I'd hate to see you give up something you enjoy and am not advising that! Maybe it would be a good idea to relocate blogs, however. Only let trusted friends know you are moving blogs, pick a new mun name that is not anywhere near those you have used in the past, do not bring up any of your former mun names. Treat this like you're in hiding because, sadly, you are. If you have to make a statement in fairness to mutuals you won't be sharing information with, only say that you are going on indefinite hiatus so they have a warning, nothing else.

This is also something I don't casually recommend, I think it goes a long way toward a genuinely saner and safer community when we all know where someone we want to avoid is so that we can avoid them. However, this only works when we're all in mature agreement to do just that, and the harassment isn't going to simply stop. Tumblr has no functionality when it comes to the tools to make it stop, you're not going to be able to convince anyone or have a reasonable discussion with them. Your options at this point are finding other ways to get it to stop, and those would include leaving tumblr totally, taking steps to evade harassment, or staying where you are and ignoring it by no longer responding to messages or speaking of it on your blog.

If you are going to try to remain where you are, I'd say to do the same things I advised the anon being harassed by the other Raven. Turn anon off, it's amazing how quickly harassment slows down when people have to either attach their names to the messages or go through the effort to make throwaway accounts. Be incredibly careful who you allow to follow from now on and go through your followers often, block anyone that seems even mildly sus to you, and don't put your blog out there for a while. Don't respond to anything connected to this, not even to defend yourself and refute accusations, they're only going to use that against you, their minds are made up. Don't post about it, don't mention it anywhere, it needs to be like this never happened. Consider going dash-only for a while, or temporarily relocating RPs to somewhere like discord or google docs while you give yourself some space from all this.

You can't force it to stop, but you don't have to keep being victimized by it until they decide to knock it off either. None of the options come without an unfair price for you, but try to think of it in terms of freeing yourself from this. Know that it is likely that your muses, RP style, mutuals, etc. might give you away eventually if you move blogs, pick a new URL, and change mun names like you're in the Tumblr Witness Protection Program. Know so that you're prepared for it this time around, you don't need to say anything to people who come to your inbox demanding you're someone else who has wronged them. In any case, again, it gives you some space from it and the plausible deniability that you didn't have the first time around because you were trying to be open and fair with others.

I'm really sorry that this person's horrible behavior just keeps harming others and that it has come to include those like yourself. There is nothing fair about this, it's never right to harass people. This person has hurt many, many people all around the RPC (and you should know that they, I'm told, are really on about the Mable thing, so, don't expect that to do anything but convince those harassing you that you are who you're saying you are not), but it's not okay to do the same shit as they are. This is a very good example as to why.

Like, I'm absolutely positive some people are going to feel like this is a falsified message, for example. But you know what? I'd honestly rather that you were the bad Raven pulling another stunt than jump to conclusions and accuse someone who has had more than enough of that. The former just adds another tally mark to their bullshit bingo card, but the latter makes me a shitty person. Let's all maybe consider that kind of thing before we decide someone is Bad Raven of Many Names and Blogs and start harassing them. Just block those blogs if you're convinced.

I hope that something works out so that you can stay here and get back to enjoying the hobby in peace! This kind of thing is really exhausting, and I totally feel you, I get stalked here, my friends get stalked on their blogs, all over this same person. I've been stalked in the past on one RP blog here twice with no connection to this, on an RP account a decade ago, and IRL. It's creepy, whether it's a twenty two year old who can't separate mun and muse who is "in love" with you, a nearly forty year old who ships themselves with you only, disgruntled former mutuals, or some people who are obsessed with curating drama. There is nothing like seeing a notification for your inbox and instead of being excited to see what a mutual sent, you half dread what nonsense you're opening up today. And it is deeply frustrating to have people take everything you've ever said or done wildly out of context in order to keep asserting things about you, knowing there isn't anything you can actually do about it.

This is no way to enjoy a hobby, it isn't the way it's supposed to be, and this behavior isn't any more acceptable in this hobby than it would be in any other. For all that tumblr is a hellscape, the RPC really should be better than this as a group both reliant on human interaction and made up of people who are variously marginalized, I'm sorry that it continually proves otherwise.

[rpbetter]

Hi Vespertine. Can you offer some advice on how to RP a character that a lot of people think I shouldn't be RPing? I've wanted to RP Hans Landa for years, I like how cunning he is and how he could react to other ideals, how he could grow, especially in modern settings where he would stick out a lot. But I'm afraid because of how people react to muses like him. How do I build up confidence? How do I keep RPing if people bother or threaten to report me? Would people even RP with me? Thank you.

Alright, first thing, I've apologized on the blog already, apologized to people before you, but like I keep saying: it's really important to specifically apologize to individuals when we do something lame like I have. I did not intend to leave the blog unattended for months, but I did. This is an important question, it's right up the alley of why I created this blog, and I left you hanging. I'm deeply sorry, and I hope that my serious delay did not cause you any further worries or to give up on your character/RP!

Okay, we can proceed now!

I'll confess, I seriously spaced on who Hans Landa was for a moment there, but quickly remembered upon Googling! He was an interesting character, and I love that movie! However, I definitely see why you're worried, Anon.

Up until the last decade, taking up a character who was villainous, yes, even a Nazi, was a mark of creative gumption. Almost everyone had a verse for their muse that today would get them anon hate, callouts, reported, and so on. You know what? We had far less drama then. So, I'm not at all in the camp of demonizing your choices, or anyone else's. I saw what worked for a more peaceful RPC for decades and I've seen what is a total nightmare on tumblr.

Unfortunately, it is a total nightmare. So, let's see what you might be looking at, what your options are.

Firstly, you have the right idea; this is a character that appeals to you creatively, and that's really all that should matter. You've got ideas, you want to see your muse grow and change through interactions, and that's very much what the whole RPC needs to be a little more interested in.

I think, based on that alone, you would find people who wanted to write with you. There are quite a few muns out there dying for more interesting interactions with muses who have been taken up because the other mun really wants to write and develop them. Especially in the multi-para and novella communities. It's a bit of bane over there, the way the majority of muses are picked purely to satisfy a fleeting interest in a fandom. They don't come across as the characters they are in canon, are never given the opportunity to develop uniquely, they just exist to fulfill the mun's intense interest that will be gone soon. That works wonderfully and happily for some, but there really are a lot of muns out there who are interested in different approaches.

I will also say that most longer multi-para and novella RPers are less supportive of callout culture and content policing. When the very way that you enjoy RP is easily considered problematic on the grounds that you take it too seriously because you're invested in it, you tend to be against labeling others and giving them a hard time. That portion of the RPC, additionally, tends to be made up of older adults. The RPC kind of despises anyone over 25 who is still RPing, and I think a decent part of that is...this. We don't usually go in on equating fiction to reality, thinking that muse=mun, or that "problematic" material needs to be driven into the darkest void for communal safety. A great deal of that is because we lived through multiple fandom experiences being obliterated by these sorts of ideas, we know this is all detrimental to the community, and are more interested in a live and let live mentality even if we are disturbed by someone's muse or writing topics.

You may wish to specifically seek out RPers who are serious veterans (around for 10+ years), multi-para to novella writers, and/or have things in their rules that imply toleration and support for dark topics, villain muses, etc. (I know I have it in my rules that minors shouldn't interact with this blog due both its content and my age, but I can't exactly verify that with an anonymous message! So, Anon, please be aware I am giving this advice as though you are legally an adult.) Seek out muns who have muses that could also be considered "problematic" or who interact with muses who could be.

Remain away from anyone participating in or supportive of callout culture and purity policing. I know that can be difficult and limiting, and it is also not a 100% safe bet that you will be avoiding problems, but at least you'll know right off that these are not your people. That includes the ever-present callouts that claim the poster "never does this," that the mun being called out is just that much of a danger, and/or those dealing in the major callout-laden muns in your corner of the community. You might agree that one or two of those muns is a legitimate problem, but it's too likely that these people are going to feel like you are too.

Know that you will, inevitably, be called worse than just a "villain apologist." I write a muse that I wanted to write for years as well, and refrained from writing for so long because of the fandom's ideas about them. However, I have never been so happy with any muse choice, it's worth it to me to have some random hatefulness sometimes. I know I'm not a horrible person, the people who matter to me on and offline know that I am not, it doesn't actually matter what someone on tumblr thinks. It doesn't matter what they think about you either, they don't know you and won't give you the opportunity to be known, so pfft to them!

It can still be a little disheartening to hear some of the especially hateful things. While my muse isn't like Hans, the comparison to that is often made. There are a lot of assumptions about my personal character, race, gender, political affiliation, and so on. I'm just going to say it: if you don't think you can handle someone randomly attacking you and labeling you as "actually a Nazi," a genocide supporter, school shooter, "white cishet republican," and so on, do not subject yourself to this. Just write with friends you know are on your side or write some fic where there is some distance and control.

I do not believe, after reviewing them again, that you would be violating tumblr's TOS by writing this muse. You would not be promoting racism, harm to others, or misleading information. Nor would you be harassing anyone. Does that mean no one will try to report you? No, unfortunately. I've gotten reported for politely disagreeing on a post and asking a question! The important thing is that nothing will happen.

I would still make it very clear that this character might be offensive to some. Seriously, I would say, "In the interest of sensitivity, please note that this muse might be offensive to some - do not interact if imagery or topics associated with historical Nazis will be triggering for you. Hans Landa is from the film 2009 Quentin Tarantino film Inglourious Basterds." Pop that into the top of a pinned post, your rules, and your blog's header statement.

Because even if tumblr wasn't a mess, it's still the most responsible thing to do to treat this sensitively. It is a sensitive matter! People should have every opportunity to be aware and make the best choice for them to interact or not.

People almost certainly will threaten to report and block. Particularly when you are still looking for writing partners and having to expose yourself to more of the community in order to do so. It'll get so much better when you start finding them, though, I promise! Once you find a good mun or two, you've kind of unlocked a pocket of potential. Those people who are more accepting, reasonable, and interested in writing and characters are naturally going to be interacting with other like-minded muns.

Finding a good base of partners might take you some time, but the good news is, the whole process will help you build up the confidence to keep writing. It helps you get in touch with both writing and the muse, what is really important to you as an RPer, and is what isn't. It feels shitty at the time, but in the end, it builds a lot of confidence in yourself, and when you pull confidence from within you, you're never totally without it again!

When you're looking for those people (I'd additionally suggest historical RPers, if there is any existent community for the movie still, and branching out to fandoms that have "problematic" characters in them that you could do crossovers with in modern settings etc.), you can still be writing and developing your muse. Write up headcanons, fleshout the character's backstory, make multiple verses so that you have many options ready to go, do some one-shots.

A great way to do that is to find memes or traditional writing questions specifically for character development, but don't wait for someone to ask you! Go down the meme/list, pick some questions that spark your interest, and base your HC posts on them. Answer questions you immediately have answers to, answer the really hard ones you have no clue about. You don't know until you develop it, after all!

It helps with confidence so much to feel confident about your writing and comfortable with the character. It'll also help non-judgemental RPers who come across your blog or want to follow you back to see your writing and interest in the muse. I know that there are muses I was not interested in from their canon, but seeing the mun's love for them and how they had uniquely developed them, I had to interact!

When you do receive the almost inevitable anon hate, I'm going to suggest something a bit radical here; the idea of not feeding the trolls doesn't always work. That's predicated upon people not already receiving a reward for sending that hate to you. You can't starve what has already eaten lunch! I've found that demonstrating that they're not getting to you is more effective, in all, incredibly controversial honesty.

Put in your rules that anon hate will be addressed only with something like...a gif of a rabbit, a random fact, or a link to a song you recommend. Then, you do exactly that. You get a message calling you derogatory things, but instead of deleting it or going off about it in a way they can just use, you respond with a picture of a bunny cleaning its ears. Block the anon after.

This, again, in all honesty, is a confidence booster. Sometimes, building confidence is about projecting it first. You are projecting an aura of non-hostile confidence that you're not any of those negative things in reality, nor is your life ruined by people who haven't anything better to do with their own lives than bother you as performative "activism" online. It's alright if it really does bother you at first! Eventually, it won't. Eventually, you'll be left in peace with the reasonable muns you've found.

You will find them! There are still muns out there who feel like the most important factors in RP are engaging muses and writing, and how the mun is truly conducting themselves. If that mun is a genuinely decent person who isn't starting problems, harassing people, forcing anything on anyone, that's what matters! Just put your muse out there in a thoughtful way around people who are interested in writing. Be respectful of the sensitive nature of the subject, tag liberally and correctly.

No matter what tumblr's RPC says, you do have the right to write any muse or topic you so desire. People also have the right to not interact, of course, but since you're concerned about it (and truly, the person who is most likely to be made uncomfortable on here), I highly doubt you'll be trying to force interactions or anything.

Unfortunately, when you write any, even vaguely, problematic muse here, you are held to higher standards. You are obliged to be ten times nicer in the face of hatefulness, to be more aware of tagging and other warnings, and so on. It's kind of a practice in acceptance, and it can be frustrating. Again, if the muse is worth it to you, it'll be fine. Just know that you'll need to not be reactive to nastiness, very responsible in how you present yourself in all ways, and that it still won't be enough for some people. And know that's alright as well! They're making a choice to be hostile without knowing you or employing the adult maturity to just not interact with you, not you.

I know it's very easy to say "don't let people get to you." Perhaps especially from someone who will openly say in the tumblr RPC in 2021 that it's 100% fine to write a Nazi muse lol but please know that my confidence was not naturally occurring. It was developed across years of nonsense, and much of it offline, in person. So, I'm not flippantly advising you to have a level of fortitude out of nowhere! I'm honestly telling you that it is a process, but I think that if you want something bad enough to stick to it through the hardest part of it, you kind of expedite that process. It makes it a bit easier if you're still enjoying yourself!

So, on that note, my additional advice is to have another muse or other hobby you can enjoy during the difficult patches, or even slow times before you establish a good group of writing partners. Do things that will keep you feeling positive and motivated to write. That looks different for everyone, but I'm certain you have something. If that does happen to be another muse, or muses, I would strongly suggest you keep it to yourself that you are the mun of this one until you get rolling. While you have exactly nothing to be ashamed of, don't tempt ruining your fun on the other blog(s) until you are established on the new one and confident about it.

If you ever need to vent or further advice, I'm not going to vanish or anything again! Drop by any time you need to, Anon. Sometimes it goes a long way knowing that even a single person out there supports you!

I hope this helped a little, and I do support you! I think you've got this!